This happens everytime especially in Tesco Holmbush. I usually retort with I should get it all in here at least I have done so far. Of course sales assistants work to a choreographed script mostly - there are some smarter ones who can see you don't need bags and you don't need reminding "how...
No 1 surely applies to the eating of all food.
Also people who gape all the time (please no smut) ie those people who are open-mouthed permanently - gormless idiots.
I do get irritated when a traffic report or news report mentions "due to a police incident".
No no and thrice no it's not "a police incident" it is in actuality police attending an incident rather than the cops creating the incident though sometimes it could be the latter.
Their They're There
Compliment Complement
Knockheart Knockhart etc
Houghton
Upmost Utmost
Premiership
Any other simple "mistake" as in the above examples.