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King Ralph for me.

I suspect rather than roping in Olly Murs on lead vocals and touring as The Smiths, it's a preventative measure designed to stop Morrissey calling Craig Gannon, Vini Reilly (is he still alive?), Stephen Street, and Andrew Paresi and going out on the road using the name.

Did anybody ever track down the Leo Sayer lookalike in the montage that is racing across the pitch after we secured promotion?

Celtic fans.

It'll be like UB40. Or Bucks Fizz.

Why not implant chips in our brains with the lyrics on them? Would do away with tickets on our phones too. Pay for your pie with mere thought alone.

One thing the Amex isn’t and never will be is “intimidating”.

A case in point being Hinshelwood in the first half in acres of space on the left but then deciding to turn back and cross with his favoured right foot and putting it straight into Muric’s mits.

Sorry, not a proper word. Dragged my average right down.

Watching him from the Upper East I was convinced we'd signed Owen Hargreaves.

But then she’ll just ask me for money.

My daughter is working one of the kiosks in the lower West today and she is massively hungover so please don’t expect world class customer service there today.

Jason Steele was busy coaching young kids down at Wish Park on Tuesday evening, watched by Lewis Dunk and his two dogs. My son was reffing another game on another pitch and spotted them. Dedication (whoa-oh!)

I’m going to see House of Love at Chalk in December and Guy Chadwick is now 68. Does he/they count?

My best mate used to be the FD at Chessington and the Monorail went right past his office window. When he gave us free tickets we always made a point of going on it several times and making a variety of gestures towards him.

Gives a whole new meaning to "I'm just going to slip into something more comfortable darling..."

The Pavilion Line is already getting on my nerves.

Sorry for your loss. I've been there with our old cat. For whatever reason, it seems harder than when a human family member passes, or at least it was for me. I have a 13 year-old dog, Nell, who is suddenly slower and less energetic, and I'm dreading the day when her time comes. Hope you're ok.

Thanks for this. I've also had five ops on my knee on the other leg in the last decade and that's doubtless compounding the issue!

is killing me. Spent all of our holiday hobbling about 30 yards behind the rest of my family. Iced it, rested it, got arches - just getting worse. Went to the docs this morning and there's nothing that can be done apparently. "Bollocks," I told him. "I bet North Stand Chat will have the...