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[Misc] Britishcore - "100 experiences that define and unite modern Britons" (it says here)



Bakero

Languidly clinical
Oct 9, 2010
14,698
Almería
Article should be called: "I'm a middle class millennial and everyone I know is a middle class millennial, except for my parents, who are just middle class". We'll assume that the Steve Jones he fancied, was the Welsh TV presenter, not the guitarist in the Sex Pistols or the host of ITV's 'The Pyramid Game'.

Makes you wonder what the universal Brit experiences really are though. I'm sure that NSC could do better.

1) Telling people in shocked tones that there are Christmas things in the supermarket next to Halloween stuff! (Despite this happening absolutely every year);

2) Getting the response "Shouldn't celebrate Halloween anyway. It's a Yank holiday" from anyone over 50:

3) Having absolutely no interest in tennis for 50 weeks of the year then trying to hold a conversation about it during the last week in June / first week in July;

4) Saying good morning to magpies if you see ever them on their own;

5) Wondering where Bill's mother lives and why the sky's always black over her place;

Over to you...

Number 5 is very West Midlands, isn't it?
 




Cheggers

Well-known member
Jul 28, 2011
294
Bang! And the dirt is gone.
Article should be called: "I'm a middle class millennial and everyone I know is a middle class millennial, except for my parents, who are just middle class". We'll assume that the Steve Jones he fancied, was the Welsh TV presenter, not the guitarist in the Sex Pistols or the host of ITV's 'The Pyramid Game'.

Makes you wonder what the universal Brit experiences really are though. I'm sure that NSC could do better.

1) Telling people in shocked tones that there are Christmas things in the supermarket next to Halloween stuff! (Despite this happening absolutely every year);

2) Getting the response "Shouldn't celebrate Halloween anyway. It's a Yank holiday" from anyone over 50:

3) Having absolutely no interest in tennis for 50 weeks of the year then trying to hold a conversation about it during the last week in June / first week in July;

4) Saying good morning to magpies if you see ever them on their own;

5) Wondering where Bill's mother lives and why the sky's always black over her place;

Over to you...
6. Feeling nothing for the first 45 minutes so complaining to the dealer and taking another, and 15 minutes later being absolutely spangled and dribbling as the double drop hits home with your arms and legs moving randomly while your eyes roll in the back of your head.
 




schmunk

Centrist Dad
Jan 19, 2018
10,100
Mid mid mid Sussex
'8. Brushing Monster Munch dust off the Barbour jacket you got for a fiver at Oxfam.' I don't know where to begin. What an absolute c#nt.
I bought a J. Crew Harris Tweed jacket (originally about $500) from Scope, for £13 in perfect condition. As a special bonus, it had* a business card from a New York strip club in the pocket..

I like Monster Munch.

:shrug:

The vast majority of the rest of the list though. Well cringe.



* still has, at least a year on,
 


Professor Plum

Well-known member
Jul 27, 2024
336
Shocker of an article from what sounds like some moany intern. Reads like something 100% designed to be posted on social media. "LOL! Hilarious list in the Guardian! How many of these are YOU guilty of!!??"

Fook off.
Yours ever,
Grumpy Old Tw*t.
 






studio150

Well-known member
Jul 30, 2011
30,055
On the Border
If that's 100 experiences that define modern Britons, is it any wonder that the Country is in such a poor state and losing it's international standing.

I'm just glad that I never look at Tik-Tok, as I'm clearly not a modern Briton.
 


Cheggers

Well-known member
Jul 28, 2011
294
Bang! And the dirt is gone.
I bought a J. Crew Harris Tweed jacket (originally about $500) from Scope, for £13 in perfect condition. As a special bonus, it had* a business card from a New York strip club in the pocket..

I like Monster Munch.

:shrug:

The vast majority of the rest of the list though. Well cringe.



* still has, at least a year on,
I am genuinely sorry to have touched a nerve. I'm pleased you like your new jacket, and I hope you got a good deal on the flight to New York, with enough spare cash to insert in Monster Munch sprinkled g strings.
 




Stato

Well-known member
Dec 21, 2011
7,141
Number 5 is very West Midlands, isn't it?
Is it? I genuinely don't know. I've no Midlands connections and it's one I've heard around here for years. Have to admit it would sound great in their accent and I'm very much in favour of this suggestion that it should be 'black over the back of Bill's mother's.'

 




Beanstalk

Well-known member
Apr 5, 2017
2,929
London
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!

“The rise of Britishcore” - https://www.theguardian.com/lifeand...eriences-that-define-and-unite-modern-britons

*shudder*

1. Umming and aahing with your partner for 10 minutes over whether to share a naan, and then just getting one each because “you only live once”.

2. Encouraging the entire pub to erupt into cheers when someone smashes a glass.

3. Flawlessly lip-syncing to: “If you see something that doesn’t look right, speak to station staff or British Transport Police. See it, say it, sorted,” on the train to Bristol Temple Meads.

etc

*cringe*

AI Podcast version here (natch).
That list is Love of Huns for homophobes.

Who the f*** signed that off?
 




Oh_aye

Well-known member
Jul 8, 2022
1,928
more like a list of common experiences for Guardianistas.

except the glass cheer, and the complaining about small prices while buying £10 beers.
The fact that he stated we are 'dropping' £50 on 4 morrettis suggests the article was written by an 18 year old work experience kid.
 


Bakero

Languidly clinical
Oct 9, 2010
14,698
Almería
Is it? I genuinely don't know. I've no Midlands connections and it's one I've heard around here for years. Have to admit it would sound great in their accent and I'm very much in favour of this suggestion that it should be 'black over the back of Bill's mother's.'


This reminded me that old Bill's mum came up before and I posted this:


I'd never heard it till I made my Midlands connections though
 


Badger

NOT the Honey Badger
NSC Patron
May 8, 2007
13,013
Toronto
Is it? I genuinely don't know. I've no Midlands connections and it's one I've heard around here for years. Have to admit it would sound great in their accent and I'm very much in favour of this suggestion that it should be 'black over the back of Bill's mother's.'

I don't think I've ever heard that phrase, or any of the variations in that article.
 




Eeyore

Colonel Hee-Haw of Queen's Park
NSC Patron
Apr 5, 2014
25,403
Well I scored 2, and one of those was at a push. And I'm very English

101. Still reading articles online that you know just aren't going to be worth the time.
 


jcdenton08

Offended Liver Sausage
NSC Patron
Oct 17, 2008
12,902
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!

“The rise of Britishcore” - https://www.theguardian.com/lifeand...eriences-that-define-and-unite-modern-britons

*shudder*

1. Umming and aahing with your partner for 10 minutes over whether to share a naan, and then just getting one each because “you only live once”.

2. Encouraging the entire pub to erupt into cheers when someone smashes a glass.

3. Flawlessly lip-syncing to: “If you see something that doesn’t look right, speak to station staff or British Transport Police. See it, say it, sorted,” on the train to Bristol Temple Meads.

etc

*cringe*

AI Podcast version here (natch).
This is exactly the type of shite I show to people who rave about The Grauniad. Utter, utter bollocks.
 


Harry Wilson's tackle

Harry Wilson's Tackle
NSC Patron
Oct 8, 2003
54,649
Faversham
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!

“The rise of Britishcore” - https://www.theguardian.com/lifeand...eriences-that-define-and-unite-modern-britons

*shudder*

1. Umming and aahing with your partner for 10 minutes over whether to share a naan, and then just getting one each because “you only live once”.

2. Encouraging the entire pub to erupt into cheers when someone smashes a glass.

3. Flawlessly lip-syncing to: “If you see something that doesn’t look right, speak to station staff or British Transport Police. See it, say it, sorted,” on the train to Bristol Temple Meads.

etc

*cringe*

AI Podcast version here (natch).
What a load of old bollocks.

(Albeit I have done the Cornwall thing).
 


Harry Wilson's tackle

Harry Wilson's Tackle
NSC Patron
Oct 8, 2003
54,649
Faversham
89 is wrong. The slang name for Eggs Benedict is 'eggy benz'.

But I do recognise the type of person who would do/say 90% or more of that list. They've always been with us. They're the same people who used to jump up excitedly to dance to 'The Birdie Song', they name their cat 'Rambo', and they say 'time to climb the wooden hill to Bedfordshire' when they want to go to bed.
aka ****s.
 




Gwylan

Well-known member
Jul 5, 2003
31,715
Uffern
Is it? I genuinely don't know. I've no Midlands connections and it's one I've heard around here for years. Have to admit it would sound great in their accent and I'm very much in favour of this suggestion that it should be 'black over the back of Bill's mother's.'

I've never heard that phrase in my life -where has that come from? It's as black as Newgate's knocker is the phrase I've learned
 


mejonaNO12 aka riskit

Well-known member
Dec 4, 2003
21,748
England
I opened the article wanting to come back with a reasoned response to the vitriol on this thread and say "it may not be your cup of tea but I can see what the purpose is". I'm very much in the camp of "we don't need to know that you don't like Coldplay". So I opened the article

And it's about here I finally lost it

47. Pairing a bucket hat with a pair of reflective motorway worker pants and Lidl trainers.

48. Trying to add Snap, Crackle and Pop from the Rice Krispies ads to your Instagram close friends stories.

49. Saying “WAHEY!”, “WAYOO!” or “WHEEYYY!” at any given time, for any given reason.


I don't understand what this is. Is it meant to be observational humour of things that don't actually happen?
 


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